来源：moronland.net
编辑：Rita@语际翻译
A wife emails tech support for marriage counseling. An interesting conversation takes place.
一位妻子发邮件给婚姻咨询部门寻求技术支持，产生了一段有趣的对话。
Dear Tech Support,
尊敬的技术支持部门，
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began
去年我把男朋友5.0升级成丈夫1.0，结果发现新程序里的会计模块发生了突如其来的变化，
making unexpected changes to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry
新程序限制了鲜花和珠宝的购买，而这在男朋友5.0程序下运行毫无问题。
applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0 and Premier League 7.2. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
此外，丈夫1.0卸载了很多其他有用的程序，比如浪漫9.9，取而代之的是其他一些不想要的程序，比如美国国家足球联盟5.0，美国职业篮球联赛3.0，英超7.2。对话8.0不再运行而且家庭卫生清洁2.6让整个系统都崩溃了，我试图用唠叨5.3 来解决这些问题，但是没有任何作用。
Signed:
署名
Desperate Wife
绝望的妻子
- - - - -Reply Separator- - - - -
回复
Dear Desperate Wife,
亲爱的绝望的妻子，
Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
要记住男朋友5.0是一个娱乐软件包，而丈夫1.0是一个操作系统。
Try to enter the command: C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can cause damage, with Husband 1.0 defaulting to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create "Snoring Loudly" wave files.
输入命令：C/我想你爱我，并且安装眼泪6.2程序。然后丈夫1.0操作系统会自动运行内疚3.0程序和鲜花7.0程序。但是，记住过度使用会造成破坏，丈夫1.0会默认程序生闷气2.5，欢乐时光7.0或者啤酒6.1。啤酒6.1是一个非常坏的程序，它会产生大声呼噜的声音文件。
Be especially cautious about the Hot Chik virus � it�s programmed to corrupt Husband 1.0 utterly (as well as all future Husband upgrades).
尤其要注意警惕小鸡病毒â�“ itâ�™s，它会导致丈夫1.0的彻底崩溃(包括以后所有的丈夫升级程序)
DO NOT install Mother In Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
不要安装岳母1.0或者重新安装另一个男朋友程序。这些程序并不能支持运行，并且会导致丈夫1.0系统崩溃。
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
总的来说，丈夫1.0是一个很好的软件，但是它的内存有限并且不能很快地学会应用新东西。
Consider buying additional software to improve performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0, Lingerie 5.3 and Keep-a-nice-body 10.1.
考虑买附加软件来改善它的性能。我个人推荐美食3.0，漂亮内衣5.3和美好身材10.1。
Good Luck,
祝好运
Tech Support
技术支持部门 | 
